Changing adoption views leave ‘developmentally uncertain’ children behind

November 9, 2009 by Shawn Douglas  
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adoption_fosteringAs National Adoption Week begins today, prospective parents are urged to consider adopting children who have more complex needs.

The British Association of Adoption and Fostering (BAAF) has published information today stating that one in every three parents looking to adopt would not consider a child born out of a pregnancy that included alcohol or drug abuse by the mother. This view on adoption is troubling given that nearly half of children in the U.K. that need adopted families originate from homes where drugs and alcohol were abused.

With National Adoption Week beginning today, BAAF wants to place an emphasis on steering prospective parents out of a fantasized ideal of adoption and into today’s modern reality of adoption.

“Two thirds of children come into care now as a result of neglect or abuse and while many have complex needs, many can flourish if parents can see them as children first, rather than as a collection of problems,” said BAAF’s chief executive, David Holmes.

“Our research highlights the gap between the expectations of parents and the needs of children. The big shift in society’s attitudes about unmarried mothers means the relatively few babies often have some sort of difficulty; that’s the reality.”

While almost 25,000 babies were adopted in the U.K. forty years ago — most originating from unwed mothers — times have changed since then. In the U.K. last year, only 80 babies under one year of age were adopted as availability has plummeted, primarily due to the mass shift in thinking about unwed or single mothers. Yet, almost half of all prospective parents in the U.K. are looking for young babies without complex histories, leaving many older children that need good homes far behind.

In the East of England, Shelagh Hutson, Norfolk County Council’s Cabinet member for Children’s Services, has faced similar issues while placing 56 children in homes last year.

“We would really encourage anyone thinking of adopting to consider what joy an older child or a child with additional needs could bring to their family,” said Hutson to the Great Yarmouth Mercury.

“People can really surprise themselves by discovering the many rewards and pleasures of parenting children who need that bit more in terms of time, energy and understanding. Watching a child’s achievements can be a cause for real celebration in adoptive family life.”

Julia Mansfield, a social worker for After Adoption, said that much has changed over the years, and urges prospective parents to be realistic and flexible.

“We now understand much more about the loss children and their birth families suffer,” said Mansfield.

“Genetic ties and shared history can never be severed. An adopted child and their new family must always live with that difference. Anyone can apply to adopt. We assess people on their qualities not on whether they are married or not.”

“It takes nine months for a baby to grow so it is legitimate to spend at least as long preparing a family to accept children into their lives. Losing one family is a tragedy; losing two is a disaster.”

To learn more about National Adoption Week or children that need good homes, please visit the associated website: www.nationaladoptionweek.org.uk

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